Venom: The Weblog

Hey there.....

2005-04-13T12:53:00.000-07:00

been busy, anyone care? i wouldn't think so. blabby blabby! I am Venom. I will update with somehting more worthwhile...soon...i hope......i'm planning for the spider.

Yeah, i'm still here...

2005-03-07T14:59:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know, I haven’t made a post in what seems like forever, but I have a very good reason…I was in the hospital. You see it all started off with that heist me and Carnage had planned that I told you about in the last post. The thing is, I never realised what an idiot Carnage can be, and a whimp too. We were both stoned, drunk if you will, and when I read the webslinger’s post on his blog, I thought he was already in Vegas. Boy was that embarrassing. So here’s what went down, even though the webslinger wasn’t in Vegas, he still wasn’t there. Good, right? Wrong!

We break into this new Jewellery store when all of a sudden, WHAP, right in the Jaw. My head flies all the way up and my world turns upside down. I’m on the floor and Carnage is hysterical, again, we’re both stoned. I try to get up, only to see the blur of purple leather, its Daredevil!

“Well, he’s blind” I say to myself, how hard can it be? Apparently, very.

I dive forward and land in a glass case housing some necklaces. Ouch. I can still taste the broken glass in my mouth. How’d glass get in my mouth? To that I answer, have you seen my mouth? Carnage is up in arms, we didn’t expect any trouble, yet trouble has found us. I’m bleeding and I’m pissed. I dive again, this time swinging my fists like a madman. Not only does the leather wearing blind boy dodge me, but I punch another glass case and then fly into it. Ouch again…

“Go get him” I tell that moron Carnage, sounding like I had nova cane in my mouth. This time I actually had splinters in my mouth and boy, lemme tell ya…

Carnage drunk is like playing pool with rope, let me just get that out there. I finally try getting up when I see a mass of flesh being hurled at me, I don’t know what it is, but does blindness make you extra strong? I didn’t see how, but I sure did hear the thumb when Daredevil sent Carnage flying. Yeah.

I’m drunk and now tired; I wasn’t prepared for any of this fighting. I make my last desperate attempt to get rid of purple boy, but boy is he agile. He throws his cane and it flies right through my legs. “Close one” I think to myself. Boy was I wrong again. I walk forward trying to be quiet, because I remember in the Daredevil movie that he hears vibrations or something. I dunno, but I was desperate. I walk forward when SLICE! I walk on the biggest splinter I ever saw and felt in my life. Just as I start hopping on one foot, POW, I get it between the eyes. Just as my head tilts back, THUNK!, the can comes back and hits me in the head.

I fell to the ground, Carnage was out cold, though I’m not sure if it was from the booze or the blows from purple boy. I though the next logical step was to call the cops- but not on blind boy’s watch. I don’t know how, but the dude, picks carnage up and hurls him into the dumpster right opposite the store. Then he picks me up and does the same. We’re talkin' like 10 feet or something, but then again, it could have been more or less, I was seeing multiple images of everything.

I’m in the dark dumpster, when I muster up the strength to at least get out, I put my hands in the edge of the dumpster and WHAM, he closes it on my finger and says to me “Spidey said to go easy on you”.

I was in agony, I luckily had a cell and called that flying green lizard to pick us up. Wouldn’t you know, that rich SOB actually has his own infirmary. I’ve been there for who knows how long and only just come out. I’m not typing this, I’m dictating and a “friend” is typing out all this stuff for me. All I have to say to Spidey is watch out, we’re planning for ya, but in cyberspace, we’re cool….

So people, no, I haven’t given up the blogging thing, though Green Goblin has told me that he has. SO please, comment, email and all that good stuff, I’ll update more, I promise, as soon as I’m back to normal in a couple days, I’ll let you in on what I have planned next, and boy this’ll be sweet!

P.S.
I'll be add a link to ya, okay sue?

-ihatespiderman@gmail.com

When Spidey's away, Venom will play.

2005-02-18T17:07:00.000-08:00

So i understand the webslinger is going to Vegas for a while. Well, this is the perfect oppertunity for me and Carnage do a little shopping, WITH 5 FINGER DISCOUNTS!!!

Here's what we got planned, we go down to this Jewellry store that i see just opened, somewhere around 40 and 45th and me and Carnage will be going to check it out. People have been saying that carnage and i don't get along, but just look at us in this picture, it really shows "us".

What we plan to do is go down to the Jewellry store, one of us will keep lookout while the other, how should i put this, "goes shopping".

Picture

For the next few days, having no websliner around will mean that i'm gonna be quite the busy body. I tell you, this is going to be sweet. I'll let you know how it goes and i'll take pictures of our spoils.

No love for the baddies.

2005-02-10T09:01:00.000-08:00

Well, there doesn't seem to be any love for the baddies. I saw on Spiderman's blog that he actually got an email. Me, all i hae is one email, and that's from Spidey hisself. Pathetic, eh? I know. :(

In other news, i got 50 Gmail imvites in my account the other day.

In other other news, well, there isn't anything much to tell you about. I've been prety lazy recently, i think i'll meet up with Carnage and we can go to the bar later or something. That webslinger keeps getting on my neerves. Every time i see him i just wanna yank him from his rooftops and swing him around with the same webbing he uses to tie me up with every time we meet. EVER FREAKIN' TIME!

Okay, breathe Venom, breathe.

Well, i know i mentioned before that i would be getting other baddies to start blogs, but they have been a little reluctant. So for now, it's just me, me and the world. *Sigh*
This is depressing. Someone email ole' venny and motivate me to get back into the game...the spider extermination game.

bah!

i have a friend.

2005-02-04T15:06:00.000-08:00

Go on and check out my buddy's blog.

samureye's blog

I have Gmail invites!

2005-02-02T18:14:00.000-08:00

http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-384f708852-1c0eb6a0d9-1a599bf744
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-384f708852-f559e89e27-64677e8135
http://gmail.google.com/gmail/a-384f708852-802404ae2c-3c007f14fd

Don't say i never did anything for anyone, okay!

I have more if you want.

PWNED!!

2005-02-01T15:51:00.000-08:00

Well i was looking all around the net and i saw that stupid webslinger WAS ACTUALLY THANKING ME for that stupid email banner. Hah!

I've been looking all over the web to see what i can do to be socially accepted and i know exactly what i can do to get one up on that arachnid, leet speek!

I know i know, i am so cool right? I couldn't believe that i was able to find out about this, now i am going to look so much cooler than the webslinger. So i'll make posts in leet now. I've been to some forums and have been learning. Want to see how good i am? Here it goes.

OMG!!!1!

I know, genious, right?
Oh yeah. Apparently, it's cool to use acronyms and to mispell exclamation marks.

If you want to learn leet, then use this nifty translator.

I also noticed that someone left me a comment, saying something about being nice. Well, to that i say....maybe. Why, well, i hear the webslinger is close pals with those guys over at the broken.
I do enjoy my tech! I guess you people know that the broken is coming back right? Well, until the new episodes are out, why not take a look at exitframe?

Anyways, if that webcrawler really is close with those guys, then i'm open to anything.
You hear that arachid boy?

On a side not, Happy Birthday to Yoshi!
As i mentioned before, i like my techm so expect to see me hook you up with some cool links and stuff. For example, look at these cool X-Play bloopers from Avi Adir!

I'm out, i'm going to contact some of those other Marvel characters at their blogs to let them know i exist. Oh and send me some email, villains like attention too. I think next time, i'll tell you my favourite blogs and whatnot. Oh and be sure to tell me where you see that damned webslinger!

I have email.

2005-01-30T17:19:00.000-08:00

Well, looky here! I was looking all over the internet for a way to make my blog better than the webslinger’s blog, and i did! You can comment on this blog without being a blogger member, yes anonymous posts! I feel oh so special now because i have something that the webslinger doesn't have. I personally prefer this hack to the default commenting system that spiderman has on his lame blog. Maybe he will want to know how i did it. Well, he can ask me, because I made an email address. Want to send me a line, then do it! Here it is!
I would love to hear from ya!

Like the special banner? Cool eh? I made one for spiderman, as sort of a peace offering. No, I’m not going soft, it’s just that I hear that the webslingre is close pals with Kevin Rose and The Screen Savers. This has me interested, I love those guys! I hope he takes it.
Spiderman's email

Yeah, thanks.

2005-01-30T09:13:00.000-08:00

Well, i'm not too in tune with this internet culture and blogging thing (as yet) but i would think that common courtesy would be something you know about, so thank you spiderman. blech, i never thought i waould say that. Why am i saying that? Well, simple, he gave me a little recognition on his blog. For that i am thankfull, i mean, don't villians need traffic too?

But really, i do hate him, that's how Stan made me. I can't change that, unless i get him to do a rewrite, but why would i? Things are great now just the way they are.

So before you go say that Venom hsa gone soft, know that i do hate him, enought to dig up some dirt! Here is a pic of Spidey when he got all "fashion concious" and stuff. Look at him, it was eventually what I would be wearing and really, it really takes me better, don't you think?

Ha ha ha! Let's see how he responds to that!

I'm working really hard to get some other villians to do the blogging thing, so expect t o hear from some of them soon.

Just so you people know, it's really hard to type with these claws, so don't be too hard on me if you notice a typo. I'd appreciate if anyone can comment and let me know where and when they see the webslinger, I'LL MUREDERIZE HIM!

Well waddaya know?

2005-01-29T17:46:00.000-08:00

See what a little persistence does? I got that old green bat to do the blogging thing. I hope he sticks with it. Go check him out.

it really makes me feel good to know that i'm not the only villain blogging now. I know the hulk is blogging as well, but really, i don't think that green sumo will be able to hold your interest very long, i mean, show him something shiny and he could barely hold his own! Ah, yes, i crack myself up!
Venom smash!

And it begins

2005-01-29T15:23:00.000-08:00

Well, well, well, what do we have here? Well, Venom here. YOu may know me as one of Spiderman's enemies. Hey, i don't know why it is that he always butts in to we villain's business for. Spiderman has it all, the girl, the fame, the job. Of course, being a journalist myslef, i have to compete with him with my legitiamt job AND when i commit crime. Why doesn't that web slinging red and blue tights wearing pansy mind his own business.
Spiderman has one up on all these villains, so when i saw that he was doing this blogging thing, i said to myself that i can't be left out, so here i am, with my own blog. I keep informed, i read the comics and saw the movies. I can only hope to get a call to do the third movie, but if i dob't get the rold, i hope Dana Carvey or Jimmy Fallon plays me, thought my real hope would be for Drew Carry, but i understand that the studios' budget is only so large
I hope stan doesn't find out about this, i'll tell you stuff he wouldn't want you to know about us, just keep your keisters here on my oh so good looking blog. Don't you just love the way the black works with the black? It really says Venom.

Back to the pansy arachnid. Last night i was walking through an alley and i saw him swinging like it's nobody's business. I got so angry! I wanted to rip him limb from limb, but i didn't go after him, instead i took a picture.

Okay, i'm getting hot headed thinking about this, so i'm out. I have some plans tonight and i can only hope that webslinger won't mingle.

Keep checking back and i'll let you know when i pulverise that spider!